Sex should be many things: fun, loving, spontaneous, exciting, adventurous and relaxing, but for some people, sex is torture: a source of fear and anxiety.
We all want to be sexually confident people who feel good about their desires and choices, but not everybody is like that. And there can be many different reasons why one could suffer from genophobia.
Below are some factors that may affect a woman’s sex life:
1. Fear of how you look naked
Thinking or feeling that are you less attractive when you aren’t wearing any clothes is a no-no and definitely a mood killer. Most people have body parts which make them ashamed and unwilling to get unclad in the presence of their partners.
They just don’t feel good about that part, hence, they get uncomfortable and nervous even before sex. Some think they’re fat, they’re too thin, they have fat thighs and legs, chicken legs, loose skin, , Hairy body, acne, rashes, moles that look like horrible, breasts that are too big, breasts that are too small, saggy breasts and everything in between.
Everyone is an expert on focusing on the negative. No one is perfect; we’re all flawed and it’s these flaws that make us unique and interesting. Honestly, your partner is probably so excited to see you in all your naked glory that they probably aren’t noticing all the things that you think makes your body so ugly and hideous. . If you tell yourself that you’re beautiful and desirable enough times, soon you are likely to believe it.
2. Fear of being inexperienced
If you’re inexperienced or have had some less-than-fantastic sexual experiences, you might worry that you aren’t good at sex, and your partner would find you less enjoyable.
Try concentrating on what you like during the act, and pay attention to your partner – being sensitive to your partner’s needs would help you feel more comfortable and take you out of the fear border.
You also may still be learning what you like and respond to. With the right person and a little experimentation, it is definitely possible to build up your confidence. Practice makes perfect or at least pretty good. So do away with that thought of inexperience today and begin to enjoy sex.
3. Fear of the outcome
This fear most times occurs with couples indulging in premarital sex. Most times, the ladies have an innate fear of getting pregnant, contracting a sexually transmitted disease, or being heartbroken.
To get over this and be able to enjoy sex, have sex only when you are married. This removes your fear and makes your sexual life enjoyable.
4. Fear of pain
Most ladies suffer also from vaginal pain during sex and they find it difficult to discuss with their partners lest they be thought frigid. Vaginismus is a very serious psychological, mental and physical problem, and you should seek treatment to overcome this.
One of the symptoms of vaginismus is involuntary muscle spasms in the vagina, so doing Kegel exercises can go a long way to restoring your sexual life.
5. Fear of disappointing your partner
Some men tend to evade sex because they believe the women expect more from them than they can give. Some believe they just aren’t up to the task, especially when they know their partners are more experienced than they are. Couples need to learn that good sex is about to give and take. Once you both understand each other’s needs, it would be easier to enjoy sex.
Sex fears are more common than you might think or know. The first step towards killing this fear is not to beat yourself up for having them. Living in today’s world, full of its everyday complexities can be stressful and sex can become a major cause of insecurity, especially for women.
If your sex life isn’t as mind-blowing as it should be, and your fears are getting in the way, try to take a step back, and do something that gives you pleasure and helps to relieve your tension.
Don’t shame yourself for not feeling as you think other people expect you to feel. Take your time, get help if you need it, and remember there’s no right or wrong way to have sex, and also always have it in mind that sex is given and take. Work with your partner to improve your sex life.