Are you a writer or blogger? Email firstname.lastname@example.org to share your content with over 200,000 FabWoman readers
If you met an amazingly sweet, wonderful, high-quality man today, would you be able to recognize him?
Most of the women we speak to on a regular basis cannot as they are often concerned with a list of qualities and accomplishments that are watered down, superficial and often shallow.
When asked what they’re looking for, they start listing a bunch of adjectives that most of us think we want; loving, caring, giving, handsome, successful, kind, well built, tall, etc. But if we all want the same thing, why then can’t we find it?
It’s because we get stuck in the pretty adjectives rather than the character that it always seems good men are scarce.
That’s the reason women waste time on unavailable or unserious men and end up not recognizing the good ones.
In truth, there are four important qualities you should be looking for in a high-quality man:
In practice, a man who has integrity is a man of his word, respects his word.
He keeps his promises and shows you his intentions through his good actions. He doesn’t just talk the posh talk, he walks the good walk.
You can trust a man with integrity to follow through and show up in your relationship in a very positive way.
His moral compass rules his choices at all times and he will always choose to do the right thing in his daily doings and by you.
Look for integrity in the small things when you first meet a man. Does he call when he says he will? Does he keep promises? Is he late to dates? Does he show integrity at work? If he can’t show integrity with the little things, he will have a hard time showing integrity when it really matters, and when it comes to important things.
Every man needs a purpose- should have a purpose. Usually, men don’t find their purpose in a relationship or family. The relationship can fuel his purpose as he daily strives to provide for his family, but it is not the source or root of his purpose.
This may be hard for women to hear, but it is true. A man usually finds his purpose in his work and how he contributes to the world.
Look for purpose early in the relationship in how he speaks about his career, goals and services. Is he passionate about what he does? Does he have goals? Is he excited about going to work, about meeting and helping people?
This doesn’t mean that he has to be a businessman or earning a six-figure pay. You can work a 9-5 and still be passionate about what you do and the difference you are making for others in the world at large.
When most women hear commitment they are thinking about a committed and monogamous relationship, but that is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to commitment.
Commitment fuels the two tips mentioned above- integrity and purpose. You must be committed to growing, learning, and having the right tools in place to live in your purpose.
If you are not committed to living in your purpose or to having integrity you can’t possibly be committed and have the ability to be in a relationship.
He encourages you when you are feeling down and support you and your dreams. Because a quality man has many good sides. One of them is being a man who supports his significant other in her dreams and goals. And always be there to join you even if you are sad or happy. Regardless of whether you want to go back to school after 20 years to get your Master’s degree, start a singing career or stay at home to raise a family, a good man will always support you and what you want out of your life.
A good man will want you to be comfortable and confident in your relationship. The very cornerstone of this is being able to trust someone, and he will realize that. Without trust, there is no foundation for love or respect.
He will understand that trust is not just handed over to someone — it has to be earned, and then it has to be kept.
He trusts you and wants you to trust him. You know that Trust is very important, whether it’s friendship or love. The first thing that everyone wants to build is trust. And it is also one of the main qualities of a good man.
6. Emotionally Intelligent
He is emotionally intelligent. It includes self-awareness, social skills, empathy, and self-regulation. He has the ability to recognize the impact of emotions on himself and others.
Perseverance is a key quality to look for because life isn’t always kind to you and you want to know that when things get real, your man can persevere. How does he deal with adversity and challenges in his life?
Perseverance is what will keep him going and recommitting to and working on your relationship through the hard times. And if you take your relationship the next step to marriage, perseverance is still needed.
In order to recognize these pillars of a high-quality man, you too must possess these qualities. It is a two-way thing. You cannot expect to find a good man and not work on yourself.