Breakups might leave you feeling so sad but every failed relationship always comes with a lesson, be it good or bad.
Ultimately they will help you establish what you’re looking for in a partner and make you a happier and more appealing person.
We have highlighted below the ways to get the best out of difficult experiences and your newly single status.
1. Accept that not all relationships last
Once you accept that some relationships are meant to be temporary, you can learn to stop blaming yourself for what you see as relationship failures. Instead take them for what they are – helpful life lessons. They might be very painful but breakups happen for a reason.
Perhaps your personalities didn’t fit well, your goals weren’t the same and your priorities got conflicted.
If you’re honest with yourself you’ll admit that you’re much better off as a result of the relationship and breakup than you would have been, if you had not experienced them at all.
2. Learn how to apply lessons
Look at past relationships and reevaluate your priorities now that you’re single. For example, you may never have known the value of being someone who always puts you first and cares for you, had you not been in a relationship with a partner whose priorities were work, hobbies or friends.
Or you may not have realized the importance of peaceful family relationships if you hadn’t dated someone with a dysfunctional family. Take these lessons and apply them to future relationships, looking for warning signs before it’s too late.
3. Find out ways to improve yourself
Blaming a partner entirely for a breakup won’t get you anywhere. Look for what you could improve about your own behaviour in a relationship. Do you communicate your feelings enough?
Are you too hard-hearted? Think about what has negatively impacted your past relationships before entering a new one. But also establish your strengths as confidence is very paramount.
4. Take stock of your own life
Don’t expect future partners to fix you. In fact, if your ideal partner were to find you in a mess, chances are he or she would make a speedy u-turn. It’s vital to take steps to change what it is that you don’t like about your life.
If you’re struggling with debt, attempt to sort the situation, little by little. It’s up to you to make your life more appealing as a single person. You and future partners need to be happy as individuals before thinking of becoming a couple.
5. Value single time
There will always be those who float from relationship to relationship. But this isn’t something to be proud of. You need to be able to rely on yourself, not others.
Time as a singleton helps you heal after a breakup, learn your lessons and discover your own resilience, which you won’t be able to do if you jump straight back into a new relationship.
In addition, it also allows for some important ‘me’ time and being single for a while can be fun!