Travelling with a new lover can feel like an exciting adventure, but recent incidents, including the tragic case of Ashlee Jenae, have raised serious concerns about women’s safety when traveling with partners they don’t fully know.
Miami lifestyle content creator and influencer Ashley Robinson, popularly known as Ashlee Jenae on social media, had just celebrated her 31st birthday and said yes to a proposal while on a trip in Zanzibar, Tanzania, with her fiancé, Joe McCann. Days later, her family received the call that no one is ever prepared for. She had been found unconscious in her villa, leaving in her wake unanswered questions.
Ashlee’s case is the latest in a pattern of women who travel with romantic partners and do not come back. Before her, there was Gabby Petito, 22, strangled in Wyoming’s Bridger-Teton National Forest during a cross-country van life trip with her fiancé, Brian Laundrie, in 2021.
While not every relationship is dangerous, data show that women are most at risk from people they are emotionally involved with. Globally, about 50,000 women were killed by intimate partners or family members in 2024, according to a report by UN Women. In fact, over half of female homicide victims are killed by a current or former partner. Africa records the highest rate of intimate partner femicide at 3 per 100,000 women, followed by the Americas at 1.5.
So how can you, as a woman, protect yourself while still enjoying love and travel? Here are 6 essential safety tips to follow when traveling with a new lover or partner.
1. Share your itinerary with trusted people
Let a trusted friend and family members know your full itinerary: flight numbers, hotel names and addresses, check-in and check-out dates, and the name of the person you are travelling with.
Set up a daily or every-other-day check-in by text or call. If they do not hear from you by an agreed time, they should have a clear protocol, who to call, which embassy to contact, and what information to share with authorities. Also, keep your phone locations on and synced to the cloud so you can access important numbers or other information in case your device gets damaged or lost during the trip.
Every detail matters in an investigation.
2. Always keep your travel documents, money, and phone with you
It is unsafe to hand over your passport “for safekeeping” to a partner you are just getting to know, no matter what. Keep your own copy of your travel documents (photographed and stored in the cloud); maintain access to emergency cash and a separate debit/credit card he does not know about, and ensure your phone is always with you and accessible to the internet. In general, avoid being fully dependent on your partner during the trip.
This means you can leave if you need to in the case of any emergencies.
3. Know your destination’s emergency landscape
Do thorough research on the landscape of your destination so that you are equipped with vital information. Know the local emergency number (it is not always 911) and save the address and phone number of your country’s nearest embassy or consulate.
Understand the local legal framework; in some countries, reporting violence or seeking help as a foreign woman can be complicated by language barriers, corruption, or laws that are not in your favour.
Tanzania, for instance, has an active legal system, but investigations involving foreign nationals can be slow and difficult for families abroad to navigate from a distance. Going in informed means you know who to call and what to say if something goes wrong.
4. Post updates on social media
In a worst-case scenario, your social media activity, which is a timestamped record of where you were at the moment, may be critical to putting the pieces together in the case of any emergency.
If a partner actively discourages you from being on your phone, posting updates, or communicating with people back home, that is a red flag, not a sign of romantic intimacy. In cases where women have gone missing abroad, investigators and families have relied heavily on the last posts, message timestamps, and location data from photos. Keep posting when you want to.
5. Have an exit plan
It is always good to have an exit strategy or a plan B, e.g., nearby hotel options, access to Uber, emergency funds, emergency contacts, and local emergency numbers. If you are travelling to a remote or rural location, e.g., a wildlife resort, a private villa, or a secluded island, think deliberately about how you would leave if you needed to, without your partner’s support.
The more remote the destination, the more important it is to have a concrete plan that does not depend on the person you came with.
ALSO READ: 5 Safety Tips For Ladies Travelling Solo
6. Trust your guts
One consistent feature of partner violence is that there are usually some warning signs.
For example, an update from Ashlee Janae’s story has pointed to suspicious behaviour in the days surrounding her death. It is alleged that, following a “misunderstanding” between Jenae and McCann, hotel management decided to “separate” the pair into two different rooms.
If something feels “off,” trust your gut and don’t ignore it. Don’t rationalize bad behavior because you’re on a “romantic trip.” It is better to leave immediately if you feel unsafe.